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SamanthaAlexandra 37, Female, California, USA - 60 entries

Jan 2007
2:54 PM PST

Yesterday and the day before I was sick and pissed. New semester means more work, more teachers, more classes, and more shit faced people you have to get to know in order to not look like a loner. When you add all of that up and mix it with being sick you come up with stress. I had a melt down yesterday in the shower. I cried like a baby. Tears running down my face before my skin was able to send a message to my brain that the water was too hot. It felt really good to just stand in the shower, hot water pouring on my head, hands in my face, tears mixing with water and dripping down to my lips. The salt tasted good. I had a revelation (if that's the right term). I don't care if I'm a loner. I will get through my classes, I always do. I just need to really follow my internal time management instincts, that's all. I'm going to do just fine because that's how I am. I am a boring, follow the rules, goody toes shoes, whom never gets a chance to have real genuine fun. I'm okay with that.

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Casey 56, Male, Colorado, USA - First entry!

Jan 2007
5:59 PM EDT

is this working?

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Miley858 31, Female, Nevada, USA - 10 entries

Jan 2007
5:17 PM EDT

*Thursday, Febuary 1, 2007* In seventh period this bee was trying to attack the girls in P.E. cuz i said a bee! and they said so? and then when it came near them they stared screaming it followed us to the locker room and then me and my friend were walking and we heard a huge scream so we ran and I fell, but it was really funny but painful. Then a boy Derrick threw Dominic to the floor and dominic got mad and when home (after we got off the bus this happend)

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charlax 71, Male, Arizona, USA - 744 entries

Jan 2007
1:46 AM MST

eye lack nothing but a home

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maureen 62, Female, Ohio, USA - 8 entries

Jan 2007
4:46 PM EDT

ok. so she left today.she moved in with her mom. she has spent the last 5 days on a drinking binge. I dont know how to feel. I do feel sad. I feel free. I just have to accept i cant fix her. I cant make her well. I have to take care of myself. I am scared of what I will do in my weak moments.I am scared what will happen to me and britton. I have no job and no money. and i dont think my family is in the position to help again. I dont want to write more know cause writing makes me think, and thinking hurts too much.

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jodigirl25 59, Female, Ohio, USA - 40 entries

Jan 2007
2:55 PM EDT

During my observation yesterday at the hospital, I got to see a baby girl come into the world, via C-Section! I was in OR, and I feel SO lucky! It was awesome and I almost cried! Then I got to see 2 pacemakers put in back to back. It was pretty interesting, and I wasn't grossed out. But the baby, Lexus, will remain on my mind, maybe forever!

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1 comment(s) - 06:49 PM - 01/31/2007

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SamJane27 40, Female, Australia - 9 entries

Feb 2007
4:21 AM AEST

31/1/07 It's my day off, I've done nothing constructive except start this journal. It's dads birthday i'll call him later and wish him well. Im dreading going to work tomorrow, I love my job to a degree but I've been doing it for so long it's becoming mundane, I need to know if Im staying manager or moving up to area manager, Im looking for something new and if I can travel around the state my boredom will be relieved. I'm thankful that I got into school, but Im nervous about it, it's been such a long time since I've done any type of study. I can only hope I cope. Moving on, hopefully I go out for dinner tonight, sit in sun have a glass of wine, bliss. And a huge boredom reliever. Im waiting to hear from Luke as to whether of not he can join me, it would be for a us to catch up.

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jazzsoulp 40, Female, Rhode Island, USA - 32 entries

Jan 2007
10:42 PM GMT

Listen!!! I want to let you in on a little secret. It's deeper than the bottom, more like skin deep. I'll make our convo. go easy so long as we use our lips and you give me the time,...In a moment I'll say whats really on my mind... "I wanted to put the strings back on my guitar and smiled because I know I'll be good enough to play him a song someday or Oneday,... and It'll go a little something like,..." I'll Love you now and long after Forever... hold me now and we'll think about tomorrow tomorrow... Die in my arms and I'll give you the kiss of life... It can't end now we have years in Love in this Lifetime... Tell me that I'm yours and I'll take my time, I'll Listen... I'll cry happy tears because with you my history is re- written... Kiss me soft, and I promise to heal your pain... Trust in me...I'll Heal your pain.... It's been a long time coming... One Love,...lpsoul

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flopus66 44, Male, Rhode Island, USA - 10 entries

Jan 2007
10:55 PM EDT

I've been back for almost a month now and it's still hard. Saddest thing is that I feel like i've lost a lot of the travel feeling and have almost assimilated back into the L.A. life. Yet, I still look around with pain to see everyone so busy, so modern, yet still so unhappy compared to people over in Australia and New Zealand, but mainly Thailand. I met an extraordinary person today. He's my new professor and he actually got fairly deep and philosophical from his own personal life. I could read the separation from others he was going through... it's the same look i see in the mirror, and proving me right, he started talking about how he just got back from a secluded area. How Trader Joes was where it really hit him when he got back: he just got back from a place were he used coconut shells as a stove for the only type of bread available and here in the States he has access to 12 different types all ready for him. He nailed what had been escaping me in the form of words: The biggest thing was the people. people here can ignore you, treat you different, see you as something other than human. when you're in a group, you feel judgment, a slight 'on guard' no matter how small it is at the back of your head for worry of social criticism. Over there you're another soul, sharing your time. it doesn't matter what you're wearing or whatnot, you're just there. These types of people are so full, yet have so little possessions. He said he feels more human from his travel, but not to worry because his egotistical self was going to come out in a couple of weeks when it wore off. I had to agree in full understanding and sadness.

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storminorma 64, Female, Florida, USA - 34 entries

Jan 2007
10:54 AM EDT

Who is so great they have the right to brag?! We should be more humble than that, and further more our blessings come from up above..anyone who thinks otherwise, isn't so wise after all.

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